22 Across 2001-2002
 |
Abby
by Jessica Ware |
I read over the letter again. I couldn’t believe this
the very man that abandoned me and my drug-addicted mother
wanted me to come and live with him. What did he think I was?
Some object with no feelings that you could just abandon and
adopt whenever you wanted to? I wasn’t sure, but I knew
that I had to face the facts. The laws were very clear: until
the age of eighteen, I was forced to move wherever my guardian
wanted me to. In this case it was eight hundred miles away
from my best friend and my boyfriend. Soon I was thrust back
into the present by the loud chants coming from the room next
door. Not again, I thought. The triplets just made the varsity
cheer squad and would do nothing but practice their never-ending
football and basketball cheers. I suppose it didn’t
help that I positively hate cheerleaders because I feel that
cheerleaders do nothing but flaunt themselves and embarrass
women all over the world. I sat on my bed thinking about how
to break the news of my departure to Rachel, my best friend,
and Mike, the guy of my dreams. Soon the familiar sound of
wet flip-flops flipping and flopping down the hallway that
led to my room reached my ears. The door opened and there
stood the figure of my best friend, Rachel Damon, fresh from
swim practice still dressed in her damp bathing suit and towel.
Her ash blonde hair was still damp and smelt strongly of chlorine.
Then she looked up and saw the look on my face.
“Ab, is something the matter?”
My plans of telling her my news soon vanished from my head.
Rachel and I had become quick friends because we had both
lived the same horrifying life. We would talk of the times
when our parents would hide us in linen closets when drug
dealers came or when they went out on the streets. We both
knew the feeling of suffocation with the small closet door
pressed against our small faces, and the anxious hours waiting
for a familiar face to open the door and tell us that it was
safe to come out. We also shared the times when our stepparents
were drunk and would beat our parents and siblings. My stepfather
beat me many times before he finally went over the edge that
horrible night and nearly killed me. I thank him for sending
me here, but I wish I could have reached freedom in an easier
way. Rachel, however, was fortunate enough to only be beaten
once by her mother’s boyfriend. “He never wanted
me,” she once told me, “he only wanted my mom.”
Rachel seemed to feel my tension. “Abby? Hello? Earth
to Abigail Pitt.” “Huh?” was my reply, “what
were you saying Rach?”
“I was asking what was the matter. Jeez Abby you don’t
seem to be yourself today. Now what’s up?”
Her cool blue eyes seemed to pierce into my soul and search
for the answer of her question.
“Nothing’s wrong.”
“Please Abby do you really think I’m that stupid?
I’m your best friend, I know something’s wrong.
Just tell me.” Then she saw the piece of paper I was
holding and asked about it. “Did Mike break up with
you? I swear if he did I’ll walk down to his dorm and…”
“Rachel, chill. Mike didn’t break up with me.
My dad wants to adopt me. I leave for Roanoke the night after
homecoming.”
Apparently this wasn’t the answer she had been expecting
because she had dropped the shirt she was holding and came
and sat down on my bed.
“Oh Abby,” was all she seemed to be able to stay.
Then she spoke again. “Abby, you are so lucky. Think
of what an opportunity this is. No more nights of laying a
bed never knowing if you’ll be adopted or if you will
be sentenced to a life on the streets. Honestly I’m
jealous of you. Roanoke did you say? I thought you father
lived in Seaside. I am happy for you, but how I wish you would
still be living here with Mike, James, and me. We’ll
write all the time, send e-mails, and instant message each
other every day. How will you tell Mike? He really loves you.”
Then she picked up the shirt that she had dropped and pulled
a pair of faded jean capris with a studded black belt and
walked out of the room with her acne face wash and other showering
essentials down to the bright pink bathroom with the white
steam from the four showers inside pouring out the cracks
of the door. I watched her figure walk down the hallway and
disappear into the bathroom. Her last question stuck with
me. How was I going to tell Mike? He had been my pride and
joy since we started dating. He was the captain and quarterback
of our small high school’s football team. He helped
me practice for volleyball and softball and always brought
a smile to my face. Many times during the half-time show when
the marching band would perform and I would follow behind
with the other flag girls in our navy and silver uniforms,
he cheered me on and told his teammates that I was his girlfriend.
Then Missy, one of the triplets entered the room and said,
“Abby, Mike told me to remind you of your double date
with Rachel and James tonight.”
“Missy?” I called as she turned to leave the room.
“Hmm?” was my indication that she was listening.
“I just wanted to let you know that you and your sisters
sound great!”
I could tell she smiling when she left and was happy that
she could enjoy her life with her sisters. I yearned to tell
her to cherish the moments when she and her sisters had together,
because you never know when the day comes that someone wants
to adopt only one or two of them, but soon she too was gone.
Then I turned to my closet and opened the door. I pulled out
a cream-colored turtleneck and a pair of navy boot cut jeans.
I pulled them over my arm and grabbed my towel and other shower
essentials and headed down to the bright pink bathroom. I
stepped in to the room and could hear Rachel singing along
with her favorite band, Blink 182, and I too began to hum
the tune of the familiar song, “First Date”, and
walked into the small cavern of a shower.
The showers at Family Manor are very unique, you pull back
the curtain and walk in there is a small bench and a rack
hanging above it to hang clothes or towels then around a corner
is the actual shower head and area where you shower. This
design helps prevent someone walking in on you during your
shower. I turned on the shower and undressed.
After my shower, I stepped out of the stall, fully dressed
with a towel on my wet head. I laid my bag of dirty clothes
and my showering essentials on a bench opposite the sinks.
I went through my shower bag and fished out a big toothcomb
and unwrapped my hair from the towel. Slowly I began to comb
out my wet hair. After I finished this task, I walked over
to the sinks and plugged in my blue hair dryer. By this time
Rachel was nowhere in sight, but next to me Heather Cruise
was applying black mascara to match her all black wardrobe.
Heather had not always been this way. She had been abandoned
on the streets with her two little brothers. Her abusive mother
left her to die in downtown Seaside because she destroyed
a shipment of cocaine when her mother was out. Heather was
able to stumble into a small drug clinic the next day with
her two younger siblings. From this clinic they were sent
to Family Manor. Not two days after their arrival at Family
Manor, Heather’s brothers had been adopted. The family
didn’t want a rebellious teenager, and they didn’t
seem to think that it mattered whether this family stayed
together or not so they took the two boys and left Heather
at Family Manor. Now Heather wore nothing but black and was
cold hearted and cruel to all the girls.
I continued to dry my hair. Soon my hair was dry and Heather
was gone. I picked up my bag and walked out of the cooling
bathroom. As I walked down the hallway I glanced in each room.
Every room (except the triplets held two beds, a large closet,
and a desk for each girl. The rooms were modestly furnished
and each room was painted bright blue with deep, sky-blue
carpeting. Soon I reached the room that I shared with Rachel
and I walked in. On my bed sat Mary and she seemed to be urgently
awaiting my arrival.
“Mary is something the matter?” I asked.
My athletic friend turned to speak, but seemed to think differently
about it. I sat down in a blowup chair that Rachel had bought
with her McDonald’s paychecks. Mary was my athletic
role model. She also helped me deal with my mother’s
death, because her mother too died of drug overdose. Mary
played basketball, volleyball, and softball. She probably
would have joined the guys tackle football team if they had
let her. She was extremely opinionated and her beautiful brunette
hair was always in a bun or a ponytail. Finally Mary spoke.
“Abby, I have to tell you something…” was
her reply.
“Go ahead. You can tell me anything.”
“Last night when Mike walked home with me last night…”
“Yes?”
“I tried to kiss him. I don’t know what came over
me. I am so sorry.”
Millions of different thoughts ran through my head. I had
already known that Mary had a crush on Mike, but she tried
to kiss him. This really was bizarre. It would have been so
much easier to be mad if it would have been Stephanie White,
my arch nemesis, but one of my allies? This was going to be
a difficult decision. I slowly took a deep breath and answered.
“Of course I forgive you, but be careful next time.”
This seemed to be the forgiveness she needed for soon she
left the room. I walked over to my bed and pulled out a pair
of zip up black leather boots with studs. I then grabbed my
makeup bag and again ventured down the hallway, but this time
I stopped at a room with the door ajar and knocked on the
open door.
“Come in,” called a familiar voice.
There on the same blue carpet sat the figure of Sadie Ledger.
She was surrounded with dress catalogs and magazines. In her
hand was a pair of black scissors. She looked up and said,
“Hey Abby, long time no see. What’s up?”
“I was wondering if you could help me with my hair and
my makeup for my date tonight,” was my reply.
“Sure come sit down.”
Sadie was the shortest of all the girls in our dorm. She was
determined to be a cosmetologist so all the girls went to
her for new hairstyles and unique eye make up. It was hard
to believe that the cops found little Sadie living off of
a small can of pork and beans from a neighborhood soup kitchen.
Sadie was also in the high school marching band, and she was
an excellent bells player.
Sadie lightly combed my hair and put it up in a half pony
and plugged in her curling iron. While she waited for the
curling iron to heat up she applied my foundation, powder,
and light eyeliner. She curled my bangs and my hair that was
down, and then she applied my eye shadow, lip liner, and lip-gloss.
According to Sadie, lipstick disguised my naturally beautiful
lips, so I always wore lip-gloss. She showed me the finished
project with one of her many mirrors. Thanked her for her
help and then returned to my room.
I grabbed my blue jean purse and walked down to the living
room. There sat Rachel, James, and Mike waiting for me. As
soon as I entered the room Mike stood up and offered me his
arm. Rachel stood too and James followed her lead. Mike and
I walked out of the room with Rachel and James behind us.
We soon reached Mike’s small car and climbed in.
After a wonderful dinner and a movie, Mike drove us to a
small park and parked the car. We all got out of the car and
walked towards a small clearing. Rachel and James walked to
another clearing and I seemed to sense Rachel wanting to give
me time alone with Mike to tell him that I was going to leave.
Mike and I walked to a small bench and sat down. I looked
into his big blue eyes and I knew that telling him I had to
go would not be easy. We began to kiss , but I stopped halfway
through the motion and he sensed I had to tell him something.
“You look beautiful tonight, Abby,” he said.
“Sadie fixed me up really well.”
“I think you’re beautiful right after softball
practice, all hot and sweaty.” “Mike, I have to
tell you something.”
“What is it Abby?” “My father’s sent
for me and I have to move to Roanoke after homecoming.”
Mike’s facial expression went from understanding to
shock: “No, they can’t take you away from me!”
“But they are Mike don’t you see, I have no choice.
The law says…” “Then lets runaway together
and get married. We can start our own family and…”
“Oh Mike, you know we can’t do that. We came to
Family Manor to avoid life on the streets not start families
on the streets.”
“I could support you. I have a job and I could get another
one.”
“Then when will we go to school? Mike your only seventeen
and I’m only sixteen, we’d never make it on the
streets.”
By this time tears were streaming down my cheeks and Mike
held my face in his hands.
“Then what can I do?” he asked.
“Help me enjoy my last few days in Seaside and make
homecoming the best.”
“Since you don’t agree with my plan I’ll
go with yours,” he replied. And he sealed his promise
with a kiss. Soon afterward we headed back to Mike’s
car and Rachel and James were patiently waiting or us there.
My mascara was running down my cheeks and Mike told James
that I had fallen and hurt my foot. The ride home was quiet
and my kiss good night was tender and remorseful. As I climbed
into bed that night, Rachel asked about what happened.
“He asked you to marry him?” she asked astonished.
“Yes. He had a whole plan of our new life together.”
“How sweet and you broke his heart didn’t you?”
“Honestly Rachel who’s side are you on? Why encourage
dreams that will cause more pain then healing?” “I
am sorry Abby.”
“I am tired.”
The next few days went by quickly and soon everyone was out
shopping for dresses. I already had mine so I hung out with
the triplets. The triplets hate malls and other stores. Their
parents had abandoned them at a SuperWalmart and to this day
they refuse to set foot in one. The day of the homecoming
dance was approaching and while many celebrated I returned
books and signed papers stating that my release from Family
Manor would be official the Sunday after I left. My locker
was empty and I spent the day saying goodbye to my teachers
and fellow students that didn’t live at Family Manor.
My dress was clean and hanging in my closet along with the
outfit I would wear on the plane. My other clothes were washed
and packed up. All of my personal belongings were gone except
my showering essentials and the locket that Mike gave me to
remember him by.
Finally, the night of homecoming came and my dorm was busy
and hectic. Sadie put my hair in a bun and curled the small
ringlets of hair that would not stay in the bun. My navy dress
with many sparkles matched my violet eyes perfectly. The only
makeup Sadie put on me was light mascara. I wore my gold locket
as my necklace and soon I was ready. I felt like Cinderella
and finally understood what she would have felt like knowing
that I had only a few more hours with my friends since I was
flying out in the morning. Mike looked very handsome in his
tux, cummerbund and all. Instead of bringing me a corsage
he brought one long steamed rose. I was touched and he led
me to his car.
When we reached the high school I began to feel sad, even
though all my friends were laughing and taking pictures I
wanted to drink in this night and remember it forever. Rachel
said she would mail me our homecoming pictures and I was content.
The night ended far to quickly and Mike escorted me home.
He kissed me good night and said he would ride with me to
the airport in the morning and soon he was gone. I was very
tired so I washed my face and crept into bed.
The next morning, I awoke and my luggage was gone. I got out
of bed and laid the pj’s I borrowed from Rachel on her
trunk. I dressed and looked back on my sleeping friend. She
seemed so content and angel like that I didn’t want
to disturb her so I lightly kissed her on the head. I left
a piece of paper on her desk with my new addresses on in and
quickly left the room.
When I entered the living room area, Mike and my social worker,
Mrs. Cain, were waiting for me. Mrs. White was also there.
She told me good-bye and she wished me luck in my new life.
Then Mrs. Cain, Mike, and I got into a cab and left Family
Manor.
When we reached the airport, Mrs. Cain checked me in and
had my bags loaded onto the plane. She told me good-bye said
to Mike that she’d meet him at the front of baggage
claim whenever he was ready to leave.
Soon my plane’s boarding call was made and Mike and
I made our tearful goodbye. He promised to call, write, and
come and visit me this summer. Then he walked me to the boarding
area. The fight attendant took my ticket and I began to walk
down the ramp. I turned around once and saw Mike standing
there alone. I began to cry and soon I reached the entrance
of the plane. I sat next to a young woman a few years older
than myself and she seemed to understand without asking me
what was the matter. The plane began to take off and I realized
that I should stop crying. Rachel and Mike would want me to
live a happy life with my father. So I bit my lip and wiped
my tears.
(top) |