Whether you live a block away or in another country, it's normal to be concerned about the welfare of your son or daughter after a major crisis has occurred. And while you might not have witnessed the traumatic event, it is normal to have experiences similar to those who did witness the event. The "ripple" effects of a crisis can be felt by persons near or far. Because everyone reacts differently to a crisis, it's important that you attend to your child's needs and allow her/him to react in their own way. The following are some suggestions for helping your son or daughter manage a crisis.

1. Check-In. It's easy to assume that because your child was a significant distance from the event that he or she was not affected. However, it's possible that she/he had friends or knew of someone involved in the incident. Your child might also experience a strong sense of vulnerability and fear. Inquire with your child about how she/he is responding to the event and give your child the opportunity to share their feelings with you.

2. Be Available. Make sure your child knows that you care about her/him and that you are available should they want to talk with you. It's not unusual after a crisis for persons to need reassurance that their family is safe.

3. Send a Care Package. Send your son or daughter a care package. This package can consist of fun and humorous items, food, caring letters, cards, pictures, and other reminders of family and home. These items and others can help your child begin to re-establish a sense of security and familiarity.

4. Encourage Them to Talk. Encourage your child to talk with friends, faculty/staff, or a counselor. It's helpful for them to not only have your support, but also for them to be able to have a support network of their own here at school.

5. Encourage Them to Get Involved. Usually, the university will sponsor activities (e.g., candlelight vigils, and memorials) to help students feel supported and begin achieving a sense of closure on a traumatic event. Encourage your child to get involved in these activities to help them manage their feelings, engage in a healthy grieving process, and receive support from other students.

6. Inform Professors. Some students have a difficult time getting to class or completing assignments. If this is the case for your child, encourage her/him to contact professors, inform them of the difficulties she/he is experiencing, and request extensions on assignments. Most professors are very understanding and are willing to work with students as long as they are kept sufficiently informed.

7. Seek Help If Needed. Sometimes students need more help than you can provide. Encourage your son or daughter to contact Counseling and Consultation should he or she have serious difficulty completing daily tasks and routines.

8. Take Care of Yourself. Parents need to care for themselves as well during a crisis. You may not be able to be physically present to help your child and that can be very frustrating and stressful. Attend to your own emotional reactions, seek support from others, and consult with a counselor at Counseling and Consultation if necessary.