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| Name | Mike Pearson | |
| Alias | Hate, Hater | |
| Height | 5'11" | |
| Weight | 150 wet | |
| Position | On the ground, dead. | |
| Sign | East Coast | |
| Hobbies | Trying to play ultimate. Catching Putty's hucks with my nose. Hating. | |
| Greatest Ultimate Moment | Not really my greatest but I caught a huck from someone and then got tackled in the end zone by some ucla scrub. Whatever. We got the point, that kid was just trying to hate. | |
| Words to Live By | Fueled by hate, Driven by heart. |